Better

I'm feeling better today. My head is much less stuffy and things seem to be moving to my chest, which is FINE. WITH. ME. I'd much rather have a cough than feel like my head is about to pop off at any moment. I'm still blowing snot everywhere and slightly lightheaded, but it's not nearly as bad as it was yesterday. Ethan's nose is running like mad, but his cough is sounding better and I no longer wince every time I hear it. Poor baby. Poor baby! Speaking of baby, Ethan turned 11 months on Monday. Which means that in less than 1 month he will be 1 year old. And that's all I have to say about that.

The job market is looking pretty good here. There are a ton of jobs in Baton Rouge that I'm looking into and will likely begin applying and submitting my resume in the next few weeks. I know most companies don't do a whole lot of hiring this time of year, and that's just as well. I'll get really serious in January when I'm armed with brand new work clothes (yay!) and Ethan is almost weaned. I'm really getting excited! I'll have to look back at this post when I'm sitting in my office on a Friday afternoon watching the clock tick. (I was excited about this? Gawd, I'd give anything to be home with E right now...) (Who knows? Maybe that won't happen. Gah, again with the negativity! Sheesh!)

I took my 4-week pics last night and am currently trying to figure out how to put them side by side with my before pics. When I took my before pics I remember looking at them and thinking hey, that's not so bad. Better than I expected! and then last night when I looked at my 4-week pics I thought to myself gah, I'm hideous! Ick! Ack! Spit! There is no difference! Waaa!, so again with the 4-week freakout. Upon closer inspection there is noticeable difference in my whole body, specifically from the hips up. D calmed me down and told me that he can see some major changes in my body, that I'm looking great and all those nice things that husbands are pretty much required to say, and it did make me feel better. He compliments me all the time but I guess I don't really hear him, I always think he's just trying to get some ass. I've always had a hard time accepting (and acknowledging!) compliments and perhaps that's something I need to work on. ANYWAY! I am more motivated than EVER now and can't wait to take my 8 week pics, which will be taken when we get back from Texas on December 28.

I'm resting up again today and it's really weird how I go back and forth with this. My thinking teeters from rest, rest! You need more rest so you can kick your own ass working out tomorrow when you're back to almost normal and won't pass out from exertion! to You cow! You're missing two workouts in a row? Psh! What a wuss... You'll wake up a hundred pounds heavier tomorrow from this! and that's when I slap myself. Why is it so hard to cut myself some slack when I'm ill? I hate that pesky self-loathing voice in my head. It's not as loud as it used to be but man, it's still there.

Yesterday I took Ethan for a mile-long stroller walk to get some fresh air and some form of exercise. It was something like 77 degrees and sunny. Today it'll be 76 degrees with scattered thunderstorms and cloudy skies all day. Tomorrow? A high of 53. I hate that we have to keep our summer AND winter clothes out all the damn time. I don't even really own many winter clothes because I get to wear them for like a day. I am achingly jealous of the people that live in places with snowy cold white winters. Mail me some snow already.

Yesterday's food

Hi-protein hi-fiber french toast with sugar free syrup
coffee with Splenda

more coffee with Splenda
choco-pb-nana-protein shake

1 whole egg plus 2 whites mixed with 1 T. basil pesto and a big handful of broccoli slaw
1 pear
green tea

small apple
2 lite string cheese

1 oz. mixed nuts

the last serving of Florentine Chicken a la Pesto (sooo good, will make this again fo' sho')
broccoli and extra spinach
green tea

stick-o-sugarless gum

Total cals: 1,595

Workout: rest day (sick day), but I did manage a walk with Ethan