GAG ME...

Ok, I'm at work. I'm reading my usual blogs online and bumming around the internet.

Exhibit A: I go to the pull down search menu on my toolbar, and what does it say? Porno. Sex. All things nasty. I'm not against porn, but I know that I never searched for that stuff here at work. And I think... who else has been on my computer? And I remember. One of the techs was here late one night, waiting for his ride. I offered him my computer to pass the time, so he'd have something to do while waiting. I clearly remember saying "NO PORN!" and he shook his head and said, "Oh, of course not" in a way that made me feel bad for even bringing it up.

Exhibit B: I look at my chair. The other day I had noticed a sticky dried drop of something in the middle of the seat, right where someone's crotch would be. I thought maybe I'd spilled some yogurt or something and moved on. This morning, upon further inspection, I noticed that same drop and looked further down the seat's edge. There is was. A runny, white, crusty stream of goo, dried as a drip off the edge of my seat. I'm no gizz expert, but I know spooge when I see it. Someone has done the deed at my desk.... one hand on the keyboard, one hand in their lap. I am beyond disgusted.