When Life Hands You Lemons...

throw them at people you don't like and run. HA! I really am trying to make lemonade. I'm trying to see the good in everything lately. I'm usually this bitter, sarcastic, dark and hopeless soul that always expects the worst. When did this happen? Why am I so cynical? It's times like these that you examine yourself from a different perspective and sometimes realize that you don't exactly like who you are. This is especially hard to do while pregnant, but I'm trying. I don't like how short tempered I've become. From puttering along in traffic to holding on the phone with a less than helpful customer service rep, I do the eye roll, the sigh, the head toss... everything that cries 'I am miserable and it's all your fault. I simply cannot be bothered with your stupidity. You are a total fucktard and you're wasting my time.' Pleasant, eh? I swear I'm fun and funny and can even seem smart at times, but these thoughts are always rolling through my head in one way or another. But now? I'm trying to think about my first day at a job I knew nothing about. Maybe this idiotic customer service rep is trying but just didn't get trained the way they should've... is that really THEIR fault? What about being stuck in traffic? Is the guy in front of me really the one to blame? I should thank the traffic for giving me an opportunity to file my nails. I should be grateful to the customer service rep for giving me some time to stretch and kick back and listen to bad hold music. I've got to learn to enjoy every little bite life has to offer, or I'm done.

Ok, here's a goal: Everytime D and I go to a certain mall in our area, someone at a particular nail booth ALWAYS hassles us as we walk by. Every single time, I have snapped some rude remark telling them to fuck off and leave me alone. D always nudges me and says "Geez baby, they're just doing they're job. Be nice!". And I always feel so mean afterwards. I am vowing that from this day forward, I will be pleasant and smiley and kind to the pesky nail hounds at the nail booth. I will smile, say "Oh, no thank you", and will refrain from shooting laser beams out of my eyeballs.

I'll just take it one day, one step at a time. I just might become a NICE person! Hey, it could happen!