Oh, baby...

A month without posting? C'mon now... SOMEONE has been slacking big time. Lots on my mind, lots going on in my life. Monday, April 25, I found out that I'm pregnant. I had been: sad, happy, bitchy, elated, depressed and late with my dreaded monthly girlie time. And my boobs had been sore beyond belief. (.) (.) They had swelled up a bit and been super sensitive to the touch. And also? THE WORST CRAVINGS EVER. Usually around PMS time I pig out to an extent, mostly on sweets and chocolate. But this time? Was different. Uncontrollable. Didn't understand what the fuck was going on, other than that I was being weak. Where had my willpower gone? So... I took Monday off from work. In the afternoon, I ran to CVS and grabbed a pregnancy test. Went home, peed on the stick... and before my very eyes, there were TWO lines. Every other time I'd ever taken one of these lil' tests, only one line had shown up. This time it was positive. Thinking that I might be seeing things or having a blond moment, I ran and got my neighbor, Amanda, to confirm. "Sara", she said. "What are you going to do?". What was I going to do. I hadn't really thought about it. I mean, I'd recently made the decision that I would probably never have kids. My fiance and I agreed. I'd always, honestly, said that I would get an abortion if I did become pregnant. And now? I couldn't do it. I considered it for about a tenth of a second. Am I 17 still in highschool? No. Did I have a one night stand and will never see the father again? Nu uh. I am 25 fucking years old and I am about to be married in September. I have a decent job and a great family who loves and supports me in everything I do. When I told my mom? She nearly died. In a good way. She said that she had been thinking about how much she'd like a grandkid the last few days. Well, doesn't everything just work out wonderfully? Haha. It took me a few days. But once I went to the doctor that Wednesday? I was super freaking excited. And I still am... I've been riding a little almost-mommy high ever since. I'm not your typical crafty-baking-Barney-wanna-be-mom by ANY means. But I don't have to be (thank God!). I'll be a great mom, and Drew will be a great dad. I've got so much love to give this kid it's unreal. So my life has changed dramatically in the last week. DRAMATICALLY. Bad hair cut? Not so dramatic anymore. NOT the end of the world. Flat tire? Nope. I'm looking at everything with a whole new perspective. The perspective of a soon to be mother. Wow. I still can't believe it.