9 Months!

Dear Ethan,

I can't even begin to describe how much you've grown and changed in the last month. You're no longer a baby, you're... a boy. It is bittersweet, so great yet so tragic at the same time.

You are all over the place. You can't sit still unless Teletubbies is on. (Why God, WHY?) Your newfound ability to crawl on your hands and knees at an illegal speed means that there is work to be done! Corners to explore, cords to chew on, a dog to chase. Also, no matter how many times I vacuum you always point out the spots I miss. You do this by crawling around, stopping suddenly and then studying the ground. A tenth of a second later you are sitting quietly, smiling at me and chewing. That's when I rush towards you to do a finger swoop, and you never want to surrender whatever bug/hairball/piece of dog food or grass you're so obviously enjoying. Naturally you purse your lips closed so tightly that they should use your mouth to trap bears. Sometimes I can retrieve the mystery item and sometimes not. I once swooped a small bug out of your mouth and I kind of wish you would've fought me a little harder for that one. If you're into eating bugs you should probably keep it to yourself.

You pull up to standing every chance you get. Your chubby little legs still quiver and shake ever so slightly, but you're getting stronger and stronger every day. Sometimes you'll hold onto my hands and actually walk with me, and I think we should probably stop doing this because I REFUSE TO ASSIST YOU IN MASTERING THIS MILESTONE. You're on your own, kid. (Waaa, don't grow up!)

You learned to clap your hands a few weeks ago and now you clap at everything. I'll say No! No! No! Do not chew on the cord to the lamp! and you will turn towards me and smile and clap. You'll finish off a jar of baby food and I'll say All gone! and you'll give yourself a round of applause. If you're especially fussy and nothing will make you happy, I can always sing Clap your hands, clap your hands! and you will always cut the crap long enough to smile and clap along with me. You're beside me in your highchair right this very second and you just clapped again. Now you're throwing egg yolk on the floor. Gah, babies are so moody.

My one complaint is that you've suddenly taken up wrestling. The moment I lay you down for a diaper change all hell breaks loose. Sometimes I actually pause to wonder if I'm accidentally severing a limb, the way you scream and flail about. If you need a diaper change in the middle of the night you get especially hostile, and when I come back to bed tired and weary your father always asks What happened? Is he ok?. I tell him that you just needed a fresh diaper and sometimes I don't think he believes me. It really sounds more like we're exorcising demons or maybe slaughtering some cattle.

You are a pro at feeding yourself now and actually seem to get offended if I try to help you. Some of your favorite foods include cubes of cheddar cheese, sliced avocado, apple-cinnamon oat cereal, whole wheat rotini with parmesan cheese and smashed peas. Your not-so-favorites include green beans, egg yolk and nectarine. Your drink of choice is apple or white grape juice, and you are less and less interested in THE BOOB these days but you still guzzle it down just the same. Weaning is not very far away and you won't get to see any boobies for many years after that so enjoy it while you can.

Your sense of humor is amazing. We often take turns mimicking each other and laughing at our silly noises and faces. You think your dad is hilarious. You squeal and giggle with delight when you chase Bogart around the house. He hates it and you know it. You have the best laugh in the whole world. You're very laid back and you seem to be able to find humor in almost anything. I hope that never, ever changes.

I'm sure every mother feels this way about her baby, but bringing you places is what I imagine being the bodyguard for a celebrity is like. EVERYWHERE we go people stop to ask about you, and the compliments are endless. People actually stop me while I'm grocery shopping. The clerk behind the city's utilities department desk asked to hold you yesterday. You dazzle everyone, and I'm not just saying that. You're very social and always happy out in public. You babble and squeal to the men you see. You smile and totally flirt with all the women. (You already have about half a million girlfriends.) From the curly q's on the top of your head to your twinkling baby blue eyes and your big toothy smile, you are quite the charmer. I hope that never, ever changes. You are such a people person and I don't know where you get it from, but it's awesome. I must say, I am quite impressed.

It's been a wild ride so far mister but I have genuinely loved (almost) every minute of it. It seems like I've learned more about myself in the last 9 months than I have in my whole life. I've grown and changed so much as a person, found patience in places that I never knew existed. Being your mom is the biggest challenge I'll ever have to face. How'd I get so lucky?

I love you.

XOXO,
mama